By Karen McMahon
“Worry is interest paid on trouble before it is due.” – William Ralph Inge
There is plenty that you can find to worry about right now as your life is changing in dramatic ways. You may be wondering if you will keep the house or where you will end up living, how you are going to make ends meet with less money and more expenses, what the child custody is going to look like, etc. It is huge and overwhelming, especially when you take it all on at once. You don’t need to go down that dark and scary alley. Looking at the big picture right now is dangerous and only leads to distress.
In 12 step programs, they advise people to take life a day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time and sometimes even a minute at a time. It is wise and healthy advice. There is no value in thinking about things that you cannot do anything about right now. Such thoughts will solve nothing and only lead to anguish. Focus your thoughts on that which you do have control over and leave the rest for another day. This does not mean to avoid the issues you must address, but rather to take a bite size approach. You will find peace of mind in ‘first things first’.
There are going to be times when you have to look at the big picture. Do so consciously. Set a goal and a finite period of time to think about things. Keep a list of research you need to do, information you need to gather and tasks you need to accomplish. Then make yourself stop thinking about it. Refocus on something that is within your control. Call a friend, talk to your kids, sit and breath for a few minutes. The goal is to realize when your thoughts bring you to a place of worry and choose to change your thinking to something that holds more value for you.
Our next topic will be SURRENDER, the value in letting go and trusting in the outcome…a path to finding serenity.
If you are finding it difficult to stay in the moment. If you are living in the ‘what if’s’ of your mind, STOP and focus on one thing that you can accomplish today; something that you actually have control over. Tell us your story.
If you have found peace in warding off worry, we want to hear from you as well. We welcome your comments.
Chief Visionary: Karen McMahon
Our team of coaches at JBD is passionate about helping men and women navigate the emotional difficulties of relationships, breakups and divorce. We work together with you to open the possibility that your current relationship challenges can lead to a rewarding voyage of self-discovery and an immensely more pleasing life experience. Together we create a path to clarity. Find out if Coaching is right for you, and accept my gift of one FREE session.
