Transitioning through divorce is more about BEING than DOING.
Our life transitions are much like the changing of the seasons. In nature, how effortlessly trees turn from young buds to deep green leaves to bright autumn hues and then dry up and fall from their branches in full surrender of what is and must be.
The barren tree then stands solidly planted throughout a bleak and frigid winter; unwavering, trusting that the sun will shine again, warm its branches and inspire new buds to bloom into lush and vibrant foliage once again.
What can you learn from this as you move through your divorce?
If you are in the early stages of divorce, it is much like the cold of winter, with naked branches, waning sunshine and long and frigid nights.
- Are you prepared for the winter of your circumstances?
- Do you have the proper protection to gracefully accept the change and loss of what was?
- Can you clothe yourself with understanding and perspective so as to accept the brisk chill of the season and be warmed by the belief that transition is at hand and the spring will soon arrive?
As your divorce process nears its end, your post divorce experience can either be an extended bitter winter or the promise of a sunny and blossoming spring. As you move out of the turmoil of the legal process into the stage of your transition, how do you choose to approach this time of your life?
You may be in full-blown fear of being alone and lonely, seeing only endless days of being single and alone or poor and uncared for. Conversely, you might view the blank canvass of your tomorrows thrilled with the possibility of new relationships, experiences and opportunities. Your perspective is not about your assets, friends or potential for dating. It is about your attitude and perspective…those things you have complete control over.
How you have negotiated the emotional season of your divorce and the lessons you have learned about yourself with give clue to how you might embark on this next leg of your journey. Have you navigated this season with resistance and frustration or surrendered and embraced the unfolding with a sense of trust and perhaps even wonder?
Change is inevitable and divorce is a devastating change under the best of circumstances. But we always have a choice as to how we navigate the changes in our lives. May we all take heed of nature’s way of being in transition. There we find the wisdom and grace to navigate transitions with surrender, trust, tenacity and acceptance; the essence of nature’s enduring success.